People need to stop acting like the goal for mentally ill/disabled people should be to stop being mentally ill/disabled. People need to stop only using relatively healthy and/or neutrotypical people as role models for neurodivergant/ill people. And I’m not just talking about things like autism. I’m talking about objectively negative disorders too.
My dad is my biggest role model for how to manage depression and anxiety, not because he “overcame” them but because he lives with them every day. Which means some nights, we get Taco Bell because he doesn’t have the energy to cook. Some weekends, we stay home because going somewhere noisy would trigger a panic attack. Sometimes he needs support from my mom or his girlfriend, and sometimes they can’t give that support, and so I have a model for how to navigate asking for support without demanding it. I have a model for expressing need and expressing pain without making anyone feel obligated or guilty.
My life would not be easier if my dad cooked every night and took us places more. My life would not be better if my dad “overcame” his mental illnesses and didn’t have them anymore. If that had happened, I would not have a model for how to move through the world as a mentally ill person. I would not know how to set MY boundaries and MY limits, because my limits are different from most people’s limits.
I’m grateful for the ill people in my life who show me how to be a healthy person within the limits of an illness. I am grateful for the people who have more restrictive boundaries in order to protect their more fragile mental health. I’m grateful that all my role models did not “overcome” their illnesses. Everyone deserves someone like that.
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- Sonder: The realization that each passerby has a life as vivid and complex as your own.
- Opia: The ambiguous intensity of Looking someone in the eye, which can feel simultaneously invasive and vulnerable.
- Monachopsis: The subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place.
- Énouement: The bittersweetness of having arrived in the future, seeing how things turn out, but not being able to tell your past self.
- Vellichor: The strange wistfulness of used bookshops.
- Rubatosis: The unsettling awareness of your own heartbeat.
- Kenopsia: The eerie, forlorn atmosphere of a place that is usually bustling with people but is now abandoned and quiet.
- Mauerbauertraurigkeit: The inexplicable urge to push people away, even close friends who you really like.
- Jouska: A hypothetical conversation that you compulsively play out in your head.
- Chrysalism: The amniotic tranquility of being indoors during a thunderstorm.
- Vemödalen: The frustration of photographic something amazing when thousands of identical photos already exist.
- Anecdoche: A conversation in which everyone is talking, but nobody is listening
- Ellipsism: A sadness that you’ll never be able to know how history will turn out.
- Kuebiko: A state of exhaustion inspired by acts of senseless violence.
- Lachesism: The desire to be struck by disaster – to survive a plane crash, or to lose everything in a fire.
- Exulansis: The tendency to give up trying to talk about an experience because people are unable to relate to it.
- Adronitis: Frustration with how long it takes to get to know someone.
- Rückkehrunruhe: The feeling of returning home after an immersive trip only to find it fading rapidly from your awareness.
- Nodus Tollens: The realization that the plot of your life doesn’t make sense to you anymore.
- Onism: The frustration of being stuck in just one body, that inhabits only one place at a time.
- Liberosis: The desire to care less about things.
- Altschmerz: Weariness with the same old issues that you’ve always had – the same boring flaws and anxieties that you’ve been gnawing on for years.
- Occhiolism: The awareness of the smallness of your perspective.
the true self stands at your peripheral
and flickers away when you turn your head
